Age is relative

Another birthday has come and gone and I still don't feel a day older than I did when I was seventeen. While I don't think that's a bad thing, I know my mother despairs of me ever "growing up," whatever that means.

I didn't tell you about my cool new book, "How to Hold a Crocodile." It's the coolest book ever! It tells you all kinds of useful things like how to become a saint, how to become the king (or queen) of England, how to make a mummy, how to leave the Earth, hold a pigeon, play the bagpipes, brandish a baton, fire a cannon, all KINDS of cool stuff! I love it!